Kate Middleton is scheduled to give birth, uhm...well, it is not exactly known when.

We’re back at the crime scene of the Mail Online’s article about how Prince William and Kate Middleton are going to save the Royal Family with the Middleton’s "middle class values."

Kate Middleton hasn’t flashed us her actual lady parts in a while, but almost every week she lets us know where they are.

Where to start, where to start!

It’s a bloody crime scene.

Queen Elizabeth II is missing a Commonwealth meeting, and is sending her son and heir apparent, Charles, Prince of Wales, in her stead.

The British are getting tired and fed-up with the ever-maneuvering Middletons, especially with Mamma Carole Middleton, who is now trumpeted by none other than "Tattler Magazine" (a very upper-crust fusion of Vogue and The Enquirer) as being the new "power behind the throne," due mostly to her insistence upon controlling William and Kate, and now getting her talons into the new royal baby.

Those "sources close to the Duchess of Cambridge" are back.

And boy, are they yapping!

Where will Kate Middleton and Prince William’s baby be born?

It’s a mystery.

Kate Middleton and her ubiquitous mother, Carole, were spotted shopping in South Kensington last week.

It’s time to free Valerie!