Kate Middleton and her husband, Prince William, are taking a “romantic holiday” in Mustique.
We told you so!
What we think is that Kate’s doppelganger needs a rest from all that running around the shops and coffee drinking. And a “romantic holiday” is always a treat!
But how “romantic” is it for Prince William when he has to vacation with all his in-laws?
Yes! Mamma Carole, Daddy Michael, Sister Pippa, and Brother James will be just a villa away!
So cozy.
The family that plays together, and holidays together, and doesn’t-let-Prince-William-out-of-their-sight together, seems to stay together. Glued together.
For now.
Gosh! What might happen if Prince William was allowed to go to Sandringham to see the Queen on Christmas, instead of hanging out with all the Mids, blowing up plastic diaper costumes, watching Pippa plate the turkey in the kitchen (where it’s so much easier, she tells us relentlessly), and watching Carole watching Willie, while James flits about in his best red holiday kimono?
The Middletons might...lose control...of William’s mind.
Yes.
And when that happens, and independent thought is allowed to enter in, who knows what will happen?
This is the same reason why Scientologists always assign their prize members, like Tom Cruise and John Travolta, “minders.” Not for protection, but for “minding.”
Just look at the very word–“mind.”
Not as in, “Mind the Gap!” No. As in, mind programming. Mind controlling.
For the Middletons there is apparently no rest from minding Prince William, but that is because the rewards of controlling William’s mind are enormous. Vast wealth, royal connections, a tacky piece of heraldry that looks (according to one expert) like it was bought at Target, endless freebies, endless publicity, gold signet rings, grace-and-favor estates, and perhaps even aristocratic titles in the future, are all genuine outcomes, provided that an heir is produced and the marriage stays reasonably intact.
And that is the part that clearly worries the Middletons. Will the marriage of William and Kate stay intact? It had better! Or else...bad things may happen. The Middletons can help with that by making sure that, unlike his father and mother, Prince William does not stray. Or even think about straying. Or even...think.
Why else would they be so omnipresent?
William and Kate can’t even spend a Christmas apart from the Middletons. They must go skiing with them. They must eat turkey and attend the carols service with them. They must go to the beach with them. They cannot even take a truly “romantic getaway” without them–all of them. We are told that Carole and Michael are busily planning a “granny wing” to their new mansion so that William and Kate’s new baby, nanny, protection officers, etcetera will have a place to stay. We are told that Carole plans to take an aggressive posture and become the baby’s nanny. We are told that Kate must spend her birthday with her family (and William, of course) en masse, in public, at Cirque de Soleil, where everyone can be photographed all together.
It is becoming increasingly clear that Prince William is not allowed to move about without his Middleton Minders. Was that what the big rush to put Kate into the hospital a while back all about? Did Prince William try to escape the Middletons' mind control for even a day or two? Was a false crisis created to reign in the Prince?
What might happen if the en masse Middletons weren’t around so much?
Gosh. The Prince might have a chance to breathe, and also to think, and to take stock of his situation. Except for ten weeks spent in an Andean hut in an impoverished Chilean village between Eton and St. Andrew's, the Middletons have never allowed Prince William to live apart from their daughter, Kate, and as much as possible, not apart from THEM. Not once in his whole adult life! According to the breathless, self-absorbed “biographies” that were shilled out via Kate’s “royal wedding,” Kate became glued to Prince William during his second year of college, and the seal has only been momentarily loosened enough so that he was allowed to go to a London bar a few times by himself.
And as soon as he could get loose, he went and grabbed another girl’s breast. We know, because the photograph was widely published. Free Willy! And he was free, for about two weeks.
But then, the Middleton glue came back.
Thwack!
What could possibly be in that adhesive to make it so sticky?
Sex, lies, more sex and sex and sex, and maybe a videotape of something damning, or at least damaging? With Carole’s brother, Gary Goldsmith, prowling about with his hookers and cocaine, who knows what evils lie inside the Middletons’ bag of tricks? What congeals the Middletons’ glue to Prince William, though, is a pound of the densest kind of ambition not likely seen in the royal world since Thomas Boleyn wheedled his way into the earldom of Ormond.
With tragic results for the Boleyns.
You remember Anne Boleyn, mother of Elizabeth I. Later, after all of Anne’s sexual magic wore off, King Henry VIII would claim that Anne Boleyn and her ambitious family had “bewitched” him into marriage. But what Henry was really talking about was mind control. As in Prince William’s case, the Boleyn family used a powerful blend of their daughters’ (yes, both daughters’ and perhaps even Boleyn’s own wife’s) youthful yet sultry sexuality, lots of family-get-togetherness at Hever Castle, en masse “family” Christmas holidays that included Henry rejecting his own family's get-togethers, sexy dress-sense, and dark looks (yes, Anne Boleyn was a famous brunette) to enrapture the King, and to assure their ascendancy to wealth and power. The Boleyns also played the fertility card–offering to solve the King’s own problems by promising him a sure production of unlimited male heirs.
Kate’s a little late with that particular card, but then, William publicly said he was not in any kind of hurry to marry her, which made the Middleton mind control all the more necessary.
So enormously successful was the Boleyns’ gambit that Henry dissolved the Roman Catholic Church in England, had the new Archbishop grant him an annulment from his first wife, Queen Catherine, secretly married a pregnant Anne on January 25, 1533 (happy anniversary!), and shipped his first wife off to a drafty castle, where she then died after a few years of steady prayer.
When one female heir from Anne materialized, but the much-promised male heirs were miscarried or stillborn, King Henry woke up from his sex-induced family-sponsored mind-control trance, and it was a furious awakening indeed. He quickly beheaded Anne and her brother, George, and then a little later, George’s wife. Somewhat amazingly, Thomas Boleyn kept his precious position at Court all the while, as did his equally ambitious brother-in-law, the Duke of Norfolk, who (as Lord High Steward) was said to have pronounced Anne’s own death sentence “with tears in his eyes,” but pronounced it nonetheless. Thomas’s wife died a year after Anne’s execution, and Thomas then died shortly thereafter. The few survivors of this interesting experiment of controlling the King’s mind, thought to be Anne’s sister Mary (Henry’s cast-off mistress), her daughter, and a son said to be Henry’s bastard, were said to have fled to Ireland, and from there, possibly further abroad, forever living in fear and hiding. Much later, the Duke of Norfolk narrowly escaped the executioner’s blade by Henry dying first, although one of his sons was not so lucky.
It’s a cautionary tale, indeed.
What does it mean for Prince William?
We live in a modern age, and the only thing the Tower’s now used for are tourists. The power of kings to execute their friends, foes, and family as easily as Henry did has long been dulled. But the relentless efforts of the Middletons to control the heir of the heir apparent, and their enormous ambitions to create a kind of modern dynasty for themselves within the Windsor Dynasty, are easily seen. It is as if the Boleyns have been reincarnated. If Prince William is to ever become his own man, and eventually king, the process of de-programming him from the Middletons’ mind control needs to start now.
It’s a cautionary tale.
If Prince William intends to be king one day, he might start by taking his own vacation, and leave his Middleton Minders at home
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