then came rick perry of the private family hunting camp with the racist name; of small government talk while pursuing big government earmarks; rocky rick of his disastrous performances in nearly every debate; and his texas budget that ensured that firemen were required to pay for their own equipment including hoses, air/oxygen tanks, fuel for their firetrucks, etc., etc.,…hell, he’s not even running first in the polls in texas.
and now comes the new teabag messiah, herman cain, except instead of messiah it turns out he’s just another mess.
while there are others who share in the credit/blame for cain’s swift demise in addition to himself, the undisputed leader of the pack of the herman cain demolition derby remains herman cain.
it started when the early teabag presidential talent pool fell flat, and cain got an opening with a snappy catchphrase: 9-9-9. the problem is that someone actually asked him how this tax plan worked exactly, precisely, and cain had a different answer for everyone who asked. now we know that this ingenious plan
1. is based on a video game;
2. shafts middle income americans like there’s no tomorrow; and
3. the 9-9-9- plan is worth about $9.99.
next came cain’s display of his keen grasp of international affairs. he doesn’t think that it’s important for a presidential aspirant to know the leaders of nations we have to deal with like, say, in his words, “ubeki-beki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan”. even hillary clinton got a laughed outta that one.
then, cain proposed using an electric fence to kill off illegal immigrants trying to come to america, but in tennessee he flip-flopped, saying he was just “joking” about killing them, and then….he went on a local tv newscast in arizona saying he wasn’t kidding after all!
is he really that stupid to not realize that even small tv markets get those kinds of videos out all over the world in about ten seconds in this day and age? well, yes, i guess he is.
let’s not forget cain’s spastic debate moment when he blamed the unemployed for being unemployed, or his declaration from on high that jesus was in fact killed by liberals.
i swear to god that i am not making any of this stuff up. it all really happened.
all of these moments were brought to you…not by liberals or democrats, not by socialists, not by occupy wall street, but by…..herman cain his own self.
but now, even these moments of brilliance have been bested, and herman cain says he knows who’s behind the revelations, the leaks and the scandal that is becoming the latest and largest nail in the coffin.
and once again, the vile persons behind it are not liberals, or democrats, or socialists, or occupy wall street. cain says the attacks come from another fallen tea party darling…rick perry. nothing in politics quite delights more than watching teabaggers turn cannibal on each other.
of course the scandal i’m talking about is that of the several sexual harassment charges against herman cain, charges raised against him long before he became a candidate, by former female employees of the national restaurant association when cain headed that lobbying group.
and while rick perry is indicted for spilling the beans in the court of herman cain, one cannot overstate herman’s own brilliant handling of the radioactive fallout. the more herman cain opens his mouth, the worse it gets.
first, he tells fox news that he doesn’t remember anything about any such charges. then he says that ohyeah he remembers now, and denies them. then he denies that anyone ever made any payments or reparation to the women because that would be the same as admitting guilt, and lo and behold, it is discovered that there have indeed been significant payments made, in return for the targets of his alleged harassment keeping their mouths shut.
but wait, there’s more! the original story was that there were two sexual harassment charges filed against cain, but now, associated press reports that a third former employee has come forward alleging that cain harassed her sexually. the attorney for at least one of the women says she is chomping at the bits to tell her story and is seeking a waiver from the nra to be allowed to speak.
meanwhile, it seems that cain’s troubles with women don’t just date back to his restaurant days. right wing radio talkshow host steve deace has publicly expressed “unease” regarding cain’s conduct towards female employees a few weeks ago when cain visited the station for an interview.
earlier this week deace told a reporter from the des moines register that he didn’t want to talk publicly about what cain did that made the women present at his radio interviews uncomfortable.
i don’t think we all need a garmin to see where this is going and how it’s gonna end, and it isn’t gonna be a nice clean job. it’s gonna be ugly, and nasty, and it’s gonna drag on until the last drop has been wrung from it.
any one of these issues alone show that herman cain is way out of his depth. combined, they will be the end of his campaign.
beyond all this, there is a new story, devious and disturbing, queued up and waiting, the epilog of the rise and fall of herman cain.
the milwaukee journal sentinel has reported that cain’s two top campaign officials, mark block and linda hansen ran a tax-exempt non-profit group called prosperity usa that helped fund cain’s campaign startup to the tune of approximately $40,000 for a variety of items including, among other things, chartered flights to louisiana and las vegas, significant breaches of federal campaign and tax laws. the nonprofit also paid as much as $100,000 to the congress of racial equality shortly before cain became a featured speaker at the group’s annual dinner. block is cain’s chief of staff.
until the cain campaign mr. block was best known in wisconsin for being accused of election law violations and settling the case by paying a $15,000 fine and agreeing to stay out of wisconsin politics for three years.
a republican election lawyer in washington familiar with campaign funding issues said “if the records accurately reflect what occurred, this is way out of bounds.” a wisconsin attorney and campaign specialist who has worked with both major parties called the transactions “staggering, questionable and possibly illegal.”
yes, herman has been reported atop the gop candidate polls in recent days, but this mirage shall now begin its transformation into mist and thin air.
cain’s last hurrah as he is about to begin his descent from the top of mount teabag is his campaign’s claim of record hauls in campaign contributions the past couple of days….but there’s more to that story than meets the eye as well…
i could tell you who the moneybag is that funded the activities now under investigation as well as cain’s recent donation “surge”….but then you might not return for my update in coming columns to find out what’s next and what’s left.
by Jeff Crouere